Innocent Origins of the Diabolic
Grow your mind with an increase in general knowledge!
The five lords of the universe gathered around and distributed the divine jobs of managing the world. But that was not like they assigned specific tasks to each other. They are created and maintained the realms and dimensions which exist in our reality with mutual discussion. They just differed in their modes. If one was benevolent, the other became more strict. If one was obsessed with science, the other invented legends to balance out the influence of one subject. Four of them were men. One was women. She was called Al. It was not her name. The lords were beyond the requirement to label themselves with a particular word. Languages were invented by mortals. The immortals don't even need to speak. One was Ush; he was the father of all demons and monsters. But he was not an evil entity. For his children, we humans were the ferocious ones. One was a child. He was the strongest of them all but his powers left him diminished in stature and intellect. We cannot be sure about the condition of his body as he was carved out in a mortal form by humans but he was surely also the naivest of all lords. Then we have Anu and Lih, the lowest of all lords.
Anu was arguably the first lord ever worshiped on earth by humans because we expect demons to worship Ush, the lord who brought them into existence. Anu was the first lord whom people mistook for God and they start adoring and venerating them however such acts are immaterial to a lord; they don't need our attention as they are God's machines, devoid of any capability to love or care. Sumerians were one of the most ancient of all civilized nations. They were fond of Anu. The Mishians were affected by the status Sumerians gave to Anu. Mishians were affected by a lot of things Sumerians did but both nations secretly abhorred each other. Sumerians were detested by other people as well so they took Anu's arch-nemesis, the demon Baal, and made him into God. Mishians took Anu's brother lord, the most unwanted of all five, and made him their supreme deity. But that wasn't their own fault. Lih was actually the lord who brought life on planet earth. He was the lord who turned the pathways of evolution to the most humane destination possible. So Mishians adopted Lih as their greatest deity and renamed him as Leehan (which simply means the Great Lih).
But the most peculiar thing about Leehan was his brother. He has many names. It has been speculated that his original name was Bukhtar or something. Maybe it was Bakhtiyar, a common Persian name, associated with many saints and kings of the Muslim people. The Orientalists called him Boctor/Poctor. But almost all theologians have verified what this Boctor signifies; he is the personification of evil, the arch-nemesis of God, the emperor of hell, the entity human beings have always feared i.e. the Devil/Satan. But how can he be Leehan's brother? Leehan has no parents. Doesn't it make the Devil a sixth lord? It is utterly impossible because the Devil is surely evil, unlike Ush. Ush is not evil. He is just sexually attractive. Boctor is a purely negative force. He is the one who made people forget about the other four lords. He is the one who portrayed Leehan as God before people when Leehan and his other four counterparts weren't even close to the level of the galactic overlords, the entities working in direct contact with God. Then how do we know even Boctor is real? Well, my friends, you can rest assured that the Devil does exist because he is the one narrating his biography right now. Hence, your humble servant Satan advises you to show some interest in the true history of the origins of the real father of all demons and the entity who has successfully thwarted all divine plans to make humans beings successful.
I know that most of my dear readers belong to the future. These words of mine aren't meant for the present-day humans. They still think that Leehan is God. They have conflicting views regarding their Prophet Mish, the man after whom they were named, otherwise they were just a bunch of masons and fishermen who couldn't perform better than their Sumerian neighbors, always whining and complaining about how their eastern brethren had a better deity! Some think Mish was Leehan; these people live in Zeran which you will call Magand in your days which is its original name. Some believe Mish was related to Leehan; these people are labelled as the mainstream/orthodox Mishians. I pity the fool who belong to either of these two schools because the truth about Mish is simpler than that.
But, O readers! You don't care about Mish at all. I know that most of you are Christians, Mohammedans, Hebrews, Magis and Indians etc. How do I know that? Can I, the great Satan, see the future? Nay, that ability has not touched my nature yet. I cannot predict the future because I can see it; I can predict the future because I have seen it. So let me begin my story which is being written down for posterity by the hands of my faithful servant L'Salar. I know I am immortal but I also know that my immortality doesn't mean I will not die. Isn't that a paradox? Well, you will understand after I tell you how I was came to be known as the Devil. Many think I was a fallen angel. That is shocking! As far as I remember, I was neither an angel nor a genie to begin with. I was a human being, born in Iran, raised in United Kingdom and settled in Canada. Now can you guess the reason why I don't want the people of today to read this astounding account of mine? Let us get over with the story of my childhood.
I will be born on 21st of December, 2012 AD, in the famous and historical city of Isfahan (Iran). Later will I learn that Muslims expect Dajjal (Anti-Christ) to appear from my birthplace. I am now at a loss to decide whether to narrate my story using past tense or future tense because, for me, all of this has happened, but for many of my readers, these events will take place after many years. Don't worry, I have managed to keep pre-20th-century hands off my book. Alright, I will now use past tense while speaking as I don't want these sentences to grow old before me.
Before my birth, my parents, who were quite affluent both economically and intellectually, discovered that their child would be a member of the strong sex. So they named me aftertheir patron saint (my first name) and my maternal grandfather (my middle name). That is how I got these words Bakhtiyar Ali-Quli Mirza stuck with my persona for a lifetime. When I moved to Manchester, my Iranian friends began calling me Balkhi because my ancestors had migrated from that Afghan city centuries ago. Though, during the days of my youth, I suggested myself the name Aram while uttering poetic verses, an ambition I soon ditched for higher studies of quantum mechanics along with personal study of all kinds of philosophical and spiritual subjects.
While the world waited the upheavals of WWIII frantically (and it began to look like the most outspoken nations against WWIII would become its first instigators out of impatience), I kept myself busy in pursuit of several goals. Not to be own judge, I was considered to be a genius. My parents called me a prodigy, a marvel among wonders. Science was my hobby. The subjects which keep students up late nights were on my fingertips and I used to clear my papers without much effort put into my studies. What I really craved along with physics were spiritual sciences. I had always been insane about trying to find new ways to make a man realize his true hidden spiritual potential, a condition achieved by but a few mortals, when man can transgress the boundaries of space-time continuum. But I didn't get serious in my researches until I got a masters degree in physics from United Kingdom (an educational institute where Newton and Hawking once walked) - as I got weari of Manchester, a city filled with so many Indians that I abhorred every single inch of it - and married a girl of my mother's choice (as my father had died some months before). I got settled in Canada and, when my mother passed away, called my sister to live with me. She was my only sibling, five years older than me. Her poor husband - who died serving his country against the neighboring terrorist country - had left her with a single boy, a child from his previous marriage. She herself was barren and her boy - whom she had been raising since he was two months old - became the object of my interest as he too was sharp and as witty as a court jester. He later served me in my activities to become liberated from the chains of space-time continuum.
I still remember the day when the idea first occurred to me. It was my thirtieth birthday and my friends gifted me the newest publication of my favorite author. That man was quite notorious for writing about a fusion between physics and spirituality, a subject I adorably called sirat-e-mustaqim (the Straight Path), not because I was a religious man. My family had never been practical about their faith. I was an atheist myself and an ardent critic of the shari'ah. I was sometimes scolded even by me non-Muslim friends for my jokes about Islam, specially the story about how Satan refused to bow down before Adam so God banished him from heavens. Little did I know that story would haunt me for the entirety of my life! But I had otherwise faith in human soul. Human Soul? You will question why an atheist believed in the existence of human soul. Indeed, I had lost my faith in God. I had lost my faith in Abrahamic God. I was ad admirer of the Hindu and Buddhist philosophies. I rejected the notion of theism but I was confident that human beings would never perish after death rather they would start a new life in a different dimension. My favorite author however didn't agree with me as he was a materialist. But one of his ideas sparked a new life in me and blew into my ears a voice which kept resounding inside my mind for the next decades. Just a years earlier, the scientists at CERN had released some new information regarding the String Theory. If my dear readers have forgotten, the world of physics was divided between the String Theory and the Loop Quantum Gravity (laymen thought LQG ever stood a chance!). With the first evidences of existence of these strings, it was evident that they are the actual building-blocks of the reality as we see it today. But the author I speak of had written about the spiritual significance of that discovery.
The author believed that the existence of these tiny strings (if an atom increases to the size of the known universe, a string will be one tree on earth) was in knowledge of the spiritualists of the past and some of them had even used them to manipulate with destiny. Then he began rambling on about how our universe can also be a string for someone else's universe and if a man get either increase gigantically or decrease frantically, both ways he can enter an alternate reality. I didn't pay much attention towards that rubbish but I had succumbed to his theory that we can control these strings to turn "the very fabric of our dimension", as people liked to say in the beginning of the century. That's when I started dreaming about controlling the destiny very seriously.
My sister's son Behram, as I have said before, was my protegee and I cared about him much as I would have cared about my own child. When I discussed these plans with him, he was thrilled. But his excitement was shortened when I rejected his childish proposal to build a time machine. He was too much immersed in the 20th century television where a scientist (who couldn't possibly have any idea how to engineer a machine), invents a chamber which can take him back and forth in time like it was a goddamn road to travel like hitchhikers! A NASA scientist was asked on the eve Mission Mangal (India's first attempt to put some men on Mars) - who was an operating supervisor of the entire adventure - whether USA, after assisting Indians on other planets, would like to think about making human beings travel back in time. The NASA scientist laughed heartily and told it was utter stupidity to even consider the possibility of an H. G. Wells kind of time machine. He described time travel as a phenomenon which can be made to happen but is mechanically uncontrollable. The Mission Mangal was a disaster as those astronauts never came back. So it convinced NASA and also Indians of the second stupidest thing people dream of i.e. space travel becoming safer.
I was thinking about, instead of making a time machine - which would not help me acquire freedom from space-time continuum - inventing some sort of scientific technique to let me live without a body. That was the first step of my plan. I had always foreseen the possibility of me needing an engineer. I had prepared Behram for that day. Thus, in the '40s, we began working on a prototype for our machine. I will not discuss the theory and mathematical assessments behind each and every portion of our decade-long mission, nor I am in the mode to exhaust this scribe of mine into penning down difficult terms involved in the field of industrial electronics. To be brief and accurate, somewhere between 2050 and 2055, we had prepared a successful machine, capable to transport an object out of the space-time continuum. We didn't experiment on inanimate objects because we needed to use that machine for our personal transportation. We had animals though and we used, at first, a dog named Qitmir, who was named by Behram after a famous dog, to embark on that historical journey. The experiment was a complete failure as the dog burst into flames with lots of lightening. My nephew was heartbroken because he had just lost his prostitute boyfriend. But I kept on mending the machine and trying to figure out what the hell went wrong until we started - just like a classic Hollywood cliche - to get readings on our meters. The dog returned from I don't know where. But it looked weak and frail. He had also gotten diminished in size and seemed old while hadn't aged at all. Two days later, it died.
My nephew proposed that he must have had traveled to another dimension where space-time continuum didn't exist. I told him he was speaking bullshit. All dimensions involve space-time continuum, unless one follow the hypothesis that the Big Bang is a natural phenomena the likes of which keeps occurring. But my machine, theoretically speaking, wasn't able to access such dimensions; it could only relieve a man of the burden of space-time. So we kept experimenting on other animals, birds, insects and even a corpse. Some returned, some stayed where they went and I never knew what happened to them (although now, as I have become Satan, I know what could have taken place). Specially, dead things never returned. Strong and sharp animals managed to return a lot. Weak animals, once back to us, died shortly after. Strong animals lasted long but all of them died eventually, one chimp took eleven months to die of weakness (but it also took him one month to return). Then my wife left me for her brother as incest, pedophilia and bestiality were finally legalized in three states of United States. But I was not angry with her as I was spending more time with my nephew and had no children with Shehrbano that blaming her would be cruelty.
Then one night, by the end of '50s, I finally completed the actual machine, able to transport a human being. That was the time when I lost my nephew as my ally and supporter. He had discovered that my machine could, if introduced to some changes only two of them were major, work as a successful teleporter, an invention that was supposed to snatch the computer's status as the greatest thing mankind had ever produced. He was more inclined towards the practical application of quantum entanglement in cloning, double-shift experiment with quantum computing and Fredson's Theory with teleportation that he not only ditched my project, he also began to build his own machine. As he was racing towards international fame, I grew restless to embark on my first journey out of the sight of God, to the place where He has no authority.
It was in 2059 AD that I wrote down my will, submitted it to my lawyer and, while the world's gazes were turned towards Behram, boarded my machine. The primary sensation was that of dizziness. Then fear overpowered me. I grew restless like an ADHD patient. Everything seemed order-less. It looked like nothing is right. I felt like screaming. Intense heat began to burn my body without inflicting any physical harm. In the end, the brightest of all lights shone upon my face until I assumed my body would disintegrate into quarks or my entire existence was going to be swallowed by a black hole created by my own invention. I felt my organs being stretched and the my eyes began to get weary of the quickest succession of particles revolving before the pupils, as if I were a living model of Einstein's postulates. Some unknown forces were grabbing and pulling my limbs away from each other. It was weird because I found myself unable to call these sensations painful. Then, when I had assured myself I was going to burst into atoms, it was went black.
I don't remember exactly when I woke up from the most bizarre of all human experiments. It was like a child acquiring consciousness for I was certain I had been there for some days but I didn't know how many days or, more importantly, where I was. It was dark, that's what I can relate for my mortal friends, because, actually, there was no color to describe what I saw during those years. I was not even aware of my own presence in the beginning. My very existence seemed strange and improper to me, like I was something that shouldn't be there. Where? That was the first question that popped out in my head the moment I realized I had traveled out of the space-time continuum. Where am I? What is this place? Is it even a place? I couldn't see anything, of course, as there was no light. I was unable to hear a thing because of the lack of air. I felt nothing for there was no atmosphere. But I was alive. I didn't breathe, my heart didn't beat and none of my organs worked the way they were commanded by nature to operate. But I was not dead. I was beyond the status of alive or death! These rules of natural digital electronics of being either 0 or 1 (dead or alive) didn't work on me no more. Then did I lose my body? No, about that I was definite; I, indeed, still possessed my body. I couldn't feel it physically but I was aware of it. But I didn't know how to locate myself. I was just like a dream, floating with his body nowhere physical. Then I thought whether I was present everywhere, like the God of the Abrahamic religions.
I still have a vague idea, now that I am God's arch-nemesis, that there was no concept of time where I existed. I didn't even know how long I will stay there. The animals I had sent there, all of them returned on their own, without me meddling with their return journey. The smartest of all of my specimens returned after several months! How long would it take me to go back to the world where I was raised and declare this good news, this genuine gospel of the genuine Messiah, to the people? That was what I wondered. And I believe I kept wondering that for years.
Then I pondered upon another significant issue. If there was no time then I could speculate where I was. I existed before the Big Bang, before the beginning of time and physics as we knew them. That made me proud for I existed before God. But I felt no joy as I had no heart to feel. I just was a mind that had popped up from nowhere and was then waiting to disappear just like that. I felt neither joy nor grief. I was neither satisfied nor disappointed. I felt no hunger or thirst, no need to rest or work, no desire to entertain myself or to communicate with fellow beings, and I was beyond the requirements that bound every living organism in their nests of sexual and physical slavery. But then the horrible truth revealed itself to me. The only path of freedom from the space-time continuum was pre-existence from Big Bang! That was not the sort of result I had expected. I had desired to become immortal that way. I wanted to be able to mend the space-time fabric with my own desire. Wrath filled my head and despair led my heart to a scream that could had destroyed the planets if there were any. Scream? I was not able to articulate for my organs were disabled. That led me to feel. Yes, I finally felt! I was angry, I needed to express my feelings. That was the moment when I began to feel other sentiments too. My body began to appear before me, quark by quark. I began to feel like a stupid person for I was sensing my brains getting simpler and weaker. The surroundings started glowing. There was light again. I could see. Yes, I could see fire! I felt nauseous. There was painless torture. That was how I made it back to my world.
When I woke up, I felt like a poor child who had spent a week with his rich cousins, living a cozy life and sharing their humdrum pleasures, only to return back to his shack of a house. It was like I was flying in the heights of the heavens and then I just dropped down on earth to live with insects. I was back to the world I was born in yet I missed my pre-existence. I found my situation akin to that of the Devil, the biblical and Qur'anic fallen angel!
I was lying in a pool of my own vomit and a puddle of oil at my feet. There was darkness in the hall that used to be my laboratory. The whole place smelt like dead mice. It hadn't been cleaned for... And then it occurred to me that the entire time I spent pre-existing, I would have to account for its every single second there on earth. I didn't know exactly how much time I spent but it counted as years. I was missing for years! The people on earth must have had assumed me dead.
My laboratory, unfortunately, was located in the outskirts of the city where I resided. So I had sugested myself to prepare for survival. I had to strive to get out of that stinking necropolis of machines and robots that were useful due to lack of care for so many years. But nature was supporting me for I discovered that a devastated backdoor linked my electronic graveyard to the outside world. It took me three days to reach civilization, A Canadian citizen assisted me to the nearest police station. They were quick in verifying my identity via internet identity services and expressed glee upon finding me alive instead of what they found online. So they took me back home where I met my sister. She told me that Behram's experiment was a total failure and he had become insane after the worldwide discouragement he received. She showed no signs of merriment at seeing her long-lost brother back for, evidently, my monster of a nephew had informed her of our experiments. The only thing she required was to see her son back home safe for he refused to answer her calls and she was too timid to visit him. Timid was one thing I had never been so I rushed to meet him and confront him on misusing my success for his misadventures.
I traveled to United States, to the famous experimental facilities at Area 51, where he had transported his entire laboratory. Area 51 had become a sight for tourists after the secret facility was exposed because of some failed adventures of a bunch of high-headed scientists. People had long suspected US secret services to withhold information regarding possible alien visitors on earth and their aircrafts when they completely ignored the truth about secret missions funded by US government, missions to financially and politically shaken the pillars of humanity with diseases, battles, poverty and all other vices. After the abortion of CIA, Area 51 was serving as Behram's playground. When I met him, he hardly recognized me. My sister had incorrectly described him to me to be a lunatic. He was not even a human anymore. He looked like a dwarf with a blackened body. But he was still a sharp fellow for he easily recounted his affairs to me. He had miscalculated and had forgotten to engineer the teleporter perfectly. Now he was trying to refund his experiments. I told him of my adventures. He began to weep. I felt sorry for him for I still remembered fondling him on my lap and cleaning the cereal from the corners of his little baby mouth. So I invited me back on board my ship of pre-existence.
I will like to confess that my trip to pre-existence had weakened me and left me a frail old man. My hair color changed, I had to undergo a laser surgery for my eyeballs, my diet became lesser than before and my bowel movements became hurtful. It was as if I had aged decades in just one year however I was actually 48 in 2060. One year? Yes, that was another riddle. I spent a year just to regain consciousness. But, apparently, time raced slower in pre-existence than it existence.
Back to my laboratory (after a sorrowful reunion of the mother with his son), I recreated my machine for it was needed only to power me up for my journey. I could return without it on my own. That was the trick! But I desired to remodel the machine so it could assist me in controlling my passage. 2060 was the year of my return and it also became the year of my second trip. Behram gave me a flux capacitor as a token of his gratitude and an object to experiment upon in pre-existence. Sadly enough, that capacitor couldn't make it back when I returned to the world in 2063.
When I regained consciousness, I was not in pre-existence. There was a huge fireball and it was revolving around a relatively massive and gigantic fireball, along with a few balls traveling around the central fireball as well. There were other sparkling bodies spread all over the place where I existed and I was sure the first time I saw them that I was in presence of a newborn planet earth. But now I had a physical presence. I was engulfed in flames and my whole existence was ablaze. I was made of fire! Yet another resemblance to Satan, I thought. The things that I felt are unrelatable for I could see, touch and feel something during my journey. For two years (which seemed like two decades), I studied the universe as it was formed. Then I noticed some flashes of light at a distance. They were whiter and brighter as I counted five. After that, I began to disappear again.
In 2063, my nephew had expanded my humble laboratory to include more rooms and more staff (I had none!). There were people working outside of my room. They were not surprised to see me. My nephew was absent so I spent a week throwing away my exhaustion for I felt like I had just delivered a baby. When my nephew visited me, I was informed that he had betrayed me once again. He had, thanks to plastic surgery, regained his actual height, bleached his face and was looking fresh from his mother's womb. He had also spent two years of my sabbatical to recreate his teleporter. How on earth was that a betrayal? Well, he had declared me dead and had inherited everything I owned. He had also destroyed my machine!
I sued him in court. He couldn't murder me because of the AGPS (Advanced GPS). The moment I appeared on earth, the authorities were informed of my arrival. I refused to tell even my lawyer where I was hiding all that time. I made up a story about a device I had created to assist me into hiding from AGPS and I wished the Canadian government to utilize my apparatus to win against the European countries in the Mediterranean Wars. My nephew stated that I was a humbug who had forged an identity. My lawyer called my sister to witness in my favor but she witnessed against me. My wife was dead (so was her brother). I had nobody else to support me. The court ruled that I were to retain 10% of my heirloom on the basis that I had strong arguments in my favor. I had Bakhtiyar Mirza's DNA for God's sake! So I used my 10% to re-establish my life. A few months later, my sister passed away in her sleep. My nephew was still busy re-inventing his teleporter.
It took me seven long years to get over with my poverty and exhaustion. During these years, my nephew completed his teleporter. He managed to hire a volunteer to embark on the first journey via his machine. The plan backfired and the man died horribly. Behram was disrespected once again so he returned to me and declared in court that he had lied against the real Bakhtiyar Mirza. So, in 2070, I, a 58 years old "geezer" (the word we use back then was "hoji/hogee"), created my machine for the second time. My nephew insisted to become the second passenger of that trip. I let him do that, my biggest mistake! Now, by the end of the eleventh century, in the villages of Magand, being known all around the world as the Evil One or the Lucifer or the Anti-Christ, I still think what the fuck happened to Behram for he was the only human being who never returned from that journey. Well, he was the only human being besides me who ever went on that journey.
I waited for him for another seven years until WWIII broke out in the world. China attacked Tibet which attacked India which attacked IRK the annihilation of which resulted in the entire Middle East waging war on Israel (for no apparent reason!). When Israel was bombarded, China and Europe joined forces against the Muslims. When the rains of blood began to smear the Atlantic Ocean, I met the two-man staff I had left with for the last time. I told them to not relocate my machine rather hid my notes at a certain cloud service so, after I return, I could use them to recreate my machine, as I didn't assume I would after before half a century. Thus, I embarked on my third journey to the past as I was now certain that I had invented a sort of time-machine, the very idea I was averse to in the first place! So, on 23rd of November 2077 AD, from Area 51 (US), I began the first diabolical journey of my life. Yes, yes, I mean it was the journey that turned me into the Son of the Morning Star.
I opened my eyes and exclaimed, "This stupid machine has taken me back to the future!" It was because I was standing on a ground. There was blue sky before me and birds were chirping everywhere. I could locate mountains at a distance though there were no human beings nearby. I found myself a shadow. I could barely discern my limbs from the environment. I decided to explore the world I existed as I could move faster than sound.
A Short Novel
Anu was arguably the first lord ever worshiped on earth by humans because we expect demons to worship Ush, the lord who brought them into existence. Anu was the first lord whom people mistook for God and they start adoring and venerating them however such acts are immaterial to a lord; they don't need our attention as they are God's machines, devoid of any capability to love or care. Sumerians were one of the most ancient of all civilized nations. They were fond of Anu. The Mishians were affected by the status Sumerians gave to Anu. Mishians were affected by a lot of things Sumerians did but both nations secretly abhorred each other. Sumerians were detested by other people as well so they took Anu's arch-nemesis, the demon Baal, and made him into God. Mishians took Anu's brother lord, the most unwanted of all five, and made him their supreme deity. But that wasn't their own fault. Lih was actually the lord who brought life on planet earth. He was the lord who turned the pathways of evolution to the most humane destination possible. So Mishians adopted Lih as their greatest deity and renamed him as Leehan (which simply means the Great Lih).
But the most peculiar thing about Leehan was his brother. He has many names. It has been speculated that his original name was Bukhtar or something. Maybe it was Bakhtiyar, a common Persian name, associated with many saints and kings of the Muslim people. The Orientalists called him Boctor/Poctor. But almost all theologians have verified what this Boctor signifies; he is the personification of evil, the arch-nemesis of God, the emperor of hell, the entity human beings have always feared i.e. the Devil/Satan. But how can he be Leehan's brother? Leehan has no parents. Doesn't it make the Devil a sixth lord? It is utterly impossible because the Devil is surely evil, unlike Ush. Ush is not evil. He is just sexually attractive. Boctor is a purely negative force. He is the one who made people forget about the other four lords. He is the one who portrayed Leehan as God before people when Leehan and his other four counterparts weren't even close to the level of the galactic overlords, the entities working in direct contact with God. Then how do we know even Boctor is real? Well, my friends, you can rest assured that the Devil does exist because he is the one narrating his biography right now. Hence, your humble servant Satan advises you to show some interest in the true history of the origins of the real father of all demons and the entity who has successfully thwarted all divine plans to make humans beings successful.
I know that most of my dear readers belong to the future. These words of mine aren't meant for the present-day humans. They still think that Leehan is God. They have conflicting views regarding their Prophet Mish, the man after whom they were named, otherwise they were just a bunch of masons and fishermen who couldn't perform better than their Sumerian neighbors, always whining and complaining about how their eastern brethren had a better deity! Some think Mish was Leehan; these people live in Zeran which you will call Magand in your days which is its original name. Some believe Mish was related to Leehan; these people are labelled as the mainstream/orthodox Mishians. I pity the fool who belong to either of these two schools because the truth about Mish is simpler than that.
But, O readers! You don't care about Mish at all. I know that most of you are Christians, Mohammedans, Hebrews, Magis and Indians etc. How do I know that? Can I, the great Satan, see the future? Nay, that ability has not touched my nature yet. I cannot predict the future because I can see it; I can predict the future because I have seen it. So let me begin my story which is being written down for posterity by the hands of my faithful servant L'Salar. I know I am immortal but I also know that my immortality doesn't mean I will not die. Isn't that a paradox? Well, you will understand after I tell you how I was came to be known as the Devil. Many think I was a fallen angel. That is shocking! As far as I remember, I was neither an angel nor a genie to begin with. I was a human being, born in Iran, raised in United Kingdom and settled in Canada. Now can you guess the reason why I don't want the people of today to read this astounding account of mine? Let us get over with the story of my childhood.
I will be born on 21st of December, 2012 AD, in the famous and historical city of Isfahan (Iran). Later will I learn that Muslims expect Dajjal (Anti-Christ) to appear from my birthplace. I am now at a loss to decide whether to narrate my story using past tense or future tense because, for me, all of this has happened, but for many of my readers, these events will take place after many years. Don't worry, I have managed to keep pre-20th-century hands off my book. Alright, I will now use past tense while speaking as I don't want these sentences to grow old before me.
Before my birth, my parents, who were quite affluent both economically and intellectually, discovered that their child would be a member of the strong sex. So they named me aftertheir patron saint (my first name) and my maternal grandfather (my middle name). That is how I got these words Bakhtiyar Ali-Quli Mirza stuck with my persona for a lifetime. When I moved to Manchester, my Iranian friends began calling me Balkhi because my ancestors had migrated from that Afghan city centuries ago. Though, during the days of my youth, I suggested myself the name Aram while uttering poetic verses, an ambition I soon ditched for higher studies of quantum mechanics along with personal study of all kinds of philosophical and spiritual subjects.
While the world waited the upheavals of WWIII frantically (and it began to look like the most outspoken nations against WWIII would become its first instigators out of impatience), I kept myself busy in pursuit of several goals. Not to be own judge, I was considered to be a genius. My parents called me a prodigy, a marvel among wonders. Science was my hobby. The subjects which keep students up late nights were on my fingertips and I used to clear my papers without much effort put into my studies. What I really craved along with physics were spiritual sciences. I had always been insane about trying to find new ways to make a man realize his true hidden spiritual potential, a condition achieved by but a few mortals, when man can transgress the boundaries of space-time continuum. But I didn't get serious in my researches until I got a masters degree in physics from United Kingdom (an educational institute where Newton and Hawking once walked) - as I got weari of Manchester, a city filled with so many Indians that I abhorred every single inch of it - and married a girl of my mother's choice (as my father had died some months before). I got settled in Canada and, when my mother passed away, called my sister to live with me. She was my only sibling, five years older than me. Her poor husband - who died serving his country against the neighboring terrorist country - had left her with a single boy, a child from his previous marriage. She herself was barren and her boy - whom she had been raising since he was two months old - became the object of my interest as he too was sharp and as witty as a court jester. He later served me in my activities to become liberated from the chains of space-time continuum.
I still remember the day when the idea first occurred to me. It was my thirtieth birthday and my friends gifted me the newest publication of my favorite author. That man was quite notorious for writing about a fusion between physics and spirituality, a subject I adorably called sirat-e-mustaqim (the Straight Path), not because I was a religious man. My family had never been practical about their faith. I was an atheist myself and an ardent critic of the shari'ah. I was sometimes scolded even by me non-Muslim friends for my jokes about Islam, specially the story about how Satan refused to bow down before Adam so God banished him from heavens. Little did I know that story would haunt me for the entirety of my life! But I had otherwise faith in human soul. Human Soul? You will question why an atheist believed in the existence of human soul. Indeed, I had lost my faith in God. I had lost my faith in Abrahamic God. I was ad admirer of the Hindu and Buddhist philosophies. I rejected the notion of theism but I was confident that human beings would never perish after death rather they would start a new life in a different dimension. My favorite author however didn't agree with me as he was a materialist. But one of his ideas sparked a new life in me and blew into my ears a voice which kept resounding inside my mind for the next decades. Just a years earlier, the scientists at CERN had released some new information regarding the String Theory. If my dear readers have forgotten, the world of physics was divided between the String Theory and the Loop Quantum Gravity (laymen thought LQG ever stood a chance!). With the first evidences of existence of these strings, it was evident that they are the actual building-blocks of the reality as we see it today. But the author I speak of had written about the spiritual significance of that discovery.
The author believed that the existence of these tiny strings (if an atom increases to the size of the known universe, a string will be one tree on earth) was in knowledge of the spiritualists of the past and some of them had even used them to manipulate with destiny. Then he began rambling on about how our universe can also be a string for someone else's universe and if a man get either increase gigantically or decrease frantically, both ways he can enter an alternate reality. I didn't pay much attention towards that rubbish but I had succumbed to his theory that we can control these strings to turn "the very fabric of our dimension", as people liked to say in the beginning of the century. That's when I started dreaming about controlling the destiny very seriously.
My sister's son Behram, as I have said before, was my protegee and I cared about him much as I would have cared about my own child. When I discussed these plans with him, he was thrilled. But his excitement was shortened when I rejected his childish proposal to build a time machine. He was too much immersed in the 20th century television where a scientist (who couldn't possibly have any idea how to engineer a machine), invents a chamber which can take him back and forth in time like it was a goddamn road to travel like hitchhikers! A NASA scientist was asked on the eve Mission Mangal (India's first attempt to put some men on Mars) - who was an operating supervisor of the entire adventure - whether USA, after assisting Indians on other planets, would like to think about making human beings travel back in time. The NASA scientist laughed heartily and told it was utter stupidity to even consider the possibility of an H. G. Wells kind of time machine. He described time travel as a phenomenon which can be made to happen but is mechanically uncontrollable. The Mission Mangal was a disaster as those astronauts never came back. So it convinced NASA and also Indians of the second stupidest thing people dream of i.e. space travel becoming safer.
I was thinking about, instead of making a time machine - which would not help me acquire freedom from space-time continuum - inventing some sort of scientific technique to let me live without a body. That was the first step of my plan. I had always foreseen the possibility of me needing an engineer. I had prepared Behram for that day. Thus, in the '40s, we began working on a prototype for our machine. I will not discuss the theory and mathematical assessments behind each and every portion of our decade-long mission, nor I am in the mode to exhaust this scribe of mine into penning down difficult terms involved in the field of industrial electronics. To be brief and accurate, somewhere between 2050 and 2055, we had prepared a successful machine, capable to transport an object out of the space-time continuum. We didn't experiment on inanimate objects because we needed to use that machine for our personal transportation. We had animals though and we used, at first, a dog named Qitmir, who was named by Behram after a famous dog, to embark on that historical journey. The experiment was a complete failure as the dog burst into flames with lots of lightening. My nephew was heartbroken because he had just lost his prostitute boyfriend. But I kept on mending the machine and trying to figure out what the hell went wrong until we started - just like a classic Hollywood cliche - to get readings on our meters. The dog returned from I don't know where. But it looked weak and frail. He had also gotten diminished in size and seemed old while hadn't aged at all. Two days later, it died.
My nephew proposed that he must have had traveled to another dimension where space-time continuum didn't exist. I told him he was speaking bullshit. All dimensions involve space-time continuum, unless one follow the hypothesis that the Big Bang is a natural phenomena the likes of which keeps occurring. But my machine, theoretically speaking, wasn't able to access such dimensions; it could only relieve a man of the burden of space-time. So we kept experimenting on other animals, birds, insects and even a corpse. Some returned, some stayed where they went and I never knew what happened to them (although now, as I have become Satan, I know what could have taken place). Specially, dead things never returned. Strong and sharp animals managed to return a lot. Weak animals, once back to us, died shortly after. Strong animals lasted long but all of them died eventually, one chimp took eleven months to die of weakness (but it also took him one month to return). Then my wife left me for her brother as incest, pedophilia and bestiality were finally legalized in three states of United States. But I was not angry with her as I was spending more time with my nephew and had no children with Shehrbano that blaming her would be cruelty.
Then one night, by the end of '50s, I finally completed the actual machine, able to transport a human being. That was the time when I lost my nephew as my ally and supporter. He had discovered that my machine could, if introduced to some changes only two of them were major, work as a successful teleporter, an invention that was supposed to snatch the computer's status as the greatest thing mankind had ever produced. He was more inclined towards the practical application of quantum entanglement in cloning, double-shift experiment with quantum computing and Fredson's Theory with teleportation that he not only ditched my project, he also began to build his own machine. As he was racing towards international fame, I grew restless to embark on my first journey out of the sight of God, to the place where He has no authority.
It was in 2059 AD that I wrote down my will, submitted it to my lawyer and, while the world's gazes were turned towards Behram, boarded my machine. The primary sensation was that of dizziness. Then fear overpowered me. I grew restless like an ADHD patient. Everything seemed order-less. It looked like nothing is right. I felt like screaming. Intense heat began to burn my body without inflicting any physical harm. In the end, the brightest of all lights shone upon my face until I assumed my body would disintegrate into quarks or my entire existence was going to be swallowed by a black hole created by my own invention. I felt my organs being stretched and the my eyes began to get weary of the quickest succession of particles revolving before the pupils, as if I were a living model of Einstein's postulates. Some unknown forces were grabbing and pulling my limbs away from each other. It was weird because I found myself unable to call these sensations painful. Then, when I had assured myself I was going to burst into atoms, it was went black.
I don't remember exactly when I woke up from the most bizarre of all human experiments. It was like a child acquiring consciousness for I was certain I had been there for some days but I didn't know how many days or, more importantly, where I was. It was dark, that's what I can relate for my mortal friends, because, actually, there was no color to describe what I saw during those years. I was not even aware of my own presence in the beginning. My very existence seemed strange and improper to me, like I was something that shouldn't be there. Where? That was the first question that popped out in my head the moment I realized I had traveled out of the space-time continuum. Where am I? What is this place? Is it even a place? I couldn't see anything, of course, as there was no light. I was unable to hear a thing because of the lack of air. I felt nothing for there was no atmosphere. But I was alive. I didn't breathe, my heart didn't beat and none of my organs worked the way they were commanded by nature to operate. But I was not dead. I was beyond the status of alive or death! These rules of natural digital electronics of being either 0 or 1 (dead or alive) didn't work on me no more. Then did I lose my body? No, about that I was definite; I, indeed, still possessed my body. I couldn't feel it physically but I was aware of it. But I didn't know how to locate myself. I was just like a dream, floating with his body nowhere physical. Then I thought whether I was present everywhere, like the God of the Abrahamic religions.
I still have a vague idea, now that I am God's arch-nemesis, that there was no concept of time where I existed. I didn't even know how long I will stay there. The animals I had sent there, all of them returned on their own, without me meddling with their return journey. The smartest of all of my specimens returned after several months! How long would it take me to go back to the world where I was raised and declare this good news, this genuine gospel of the genuine Messiah, to the people? That was what I wondered. And I believe I kept wondering that for years.
Then I pondered upon another significant issue. If there was no time then I could speculate where I was. I existed before the Big Bang, before the beginning of time and physics as we knew them. That made me proud for I existed before God. But I felt no joy as I had no heart to feel. I just was a mind that had popped up from nowhere and was then waiting to disappear just like that. I felt neither joy nor grief. I was neither satisfied nor disappointed. I felt no hunger or thirst, no need to rest or work, no desire to entertain myself or to communicate with fellow beings, and I was beyond the requirements that bound every living organism in their nests of sexual and physical slavery. But then the horrible truth revealed itself to me. The only path of freedom from the space-time continuum was pre-existence from Big Bang! That was not the sort of result I had expected. I had desired to become immortal that way. I wanted to be able to mend the space-time fabric with my own desire. Wrath filled my head and despair led my heart to a scream that could had destroyed the planets if there were any. Scream? I was not able to articulate for my organs were disabled. That led me to feel. Yes, I finally felt! I was angry, I needed to express my feelings. That was the moment when I began to feel other sentiments too. My body began to appear before me, quark by quark. I began to feel like a stupid person for I was sensing my brains getting simpler and weaker. The surroundings started glowing. There was light again. I could see. Yes, I could see fire! I felt nauseous. There was painless torture. That was how I made it back to my world.
When I woke up, I felt like a poor child who had spent a week with his rich cousins, living a cozy life and sharing their humdrum pleasures, only to return back to his shack of a house. It was like I was flying in the heights of the heavens and then I just dropped down on earth to live with insects. I was back to the world I was born in yet I missed my pre-existence. I found my situation akin to that of the Devil, the biblical and Qur'anic fallen angel!
I was lying in a pool of my own vomit and a puddle of oil at my feet. There was darkness in the hall that used to be my laboratory. The whole place smelt like dead mice. It hadn't been cleaned for... And then it occurred to me that the entire time I spent pre-existing, I would have to account for its every single second there on earth. I didn't know exactly how much time I spent but it counted as years. I was missing for years! The people on earth must have had assumed me dead.
My laboratory, unfortunately, was located in the outskirts of the city where I resided. So I had sugested myself to prepare for survival. I had to strive to get out of that stinking necropolis of machines and robots that were useful due to lack of care for so many years. But nature was supporting me for I discovered that a devastated backdoor linked my electronic graveyard to the outside world. It took me three days to reach civilization, A Canadian citizen assisted me to the nearest police station. They were quick in verifying my identity via internet identity services and expressed glee upon finding me alive instead of what they found online. So they took me back home where I met my sister. She told me that Behram's experiment was a total failure and he had become insane after the worldwide discouragement he received. She showed no signs of merriment at seeing her long-lost brother back for, evidently, my monster of a nephew had informed her of our experiments. The only thing she required was to see her son back home safe for he refused to answer her calls and she was too timid to visit him. Timid was one thing I had never been so I rushed to meet him and confront him on misusing my success for his misadventures.
I traveled to United States, to the famous experimental facilities at Area 51, where he had transported his entire laboratory. Area 51 had become a sight for tourists after the secret facility was exposed because of some failed adventures of a bunch of high-headed scientists. People had long suspected US secret services to withhold information regarding possible alien visitors on earth and their aircrafts when they completely ignored the truth about secret missions funded by US government, missions to financially and politically shaken the pillars of humanity with diseases, battles, poverty and all other vices. After the abortion of CIA, Area 51 was serving as Behram's playground. When I met him, he hardly recognized me. My sister had incorrectly described him to me to be a lunatic. He was not even a human anymore. He looked like a dwarf with a blackened body. But he was still a sharp fellow for he easily recounted his affairs to me. He had miscalculated and had forgotten to engineer the teleporter perfectly. Now he was trying to refund his experiments. I told him of my adventures. He began to weep. I felt sorry for him for I still remembered fondling him on my lap and cleaning the cereal from the corners of his little baby mouth. So I invited me back on board my ship of pre-existence.
I will like to confess that my trip to pre-existence had weakened me and left me a frail old man. My hair color changed, I had to undergo a laser surgery for my eyeballs, my diet became lesser than before and my bowel movements became hurtful. It was as if I had aged decades in just one year however I was actually 48 in 2060. One year? Yes, that was another riddle. I spent a year just to regain consciousness. But, apparently, time raced slower in pre-existence than it existence.
Back to my laboratory (after a sorrowful reunion of the mother with his son), I recreated my machine for it was needed only to power me up for my journey. I could return without it on my own. That was the trick! But I desired to remodel the machine so it could assist me in controlling my passage. 2060 was the year of my return and it also became the year of my second trip. Behram gave me a flux capacitor as a token of his gratitude and an object to experiment upon in pre-existence. Sadly enough, that capacitor couldn't make it back when I returned to the world in 2063.
When I regained consciousness, I was not in pre-existence. There was a huge fireball and it was revolving around a relatively massive and gigantic fireball, along with a few balls traveling around the central fireball as well. There were other sparkling bodies spread all over the place where I existed and I was sure the first time I saw them that I was in presence of a newborn planet earth. But now I had a physical presence. I was engulfed in flames and my whole existence was ablaze. I was made of fire! Yet another resemblance to Satan, I thought. The things that I felt are unrelatable for I could see, touch and feel something during my journey. For two years (which seemed like two decades), I studied the universe as it was formed. Then I noticed some flashes of light at a distance. They were whiter and brighter as I counted five. After that, I began to disappear again.
In 2063, my nephew had expanded my humble laboratory to include more rooms and more staff (I had none!). There were people working outside of my room. They were not surprised to see me. My nephew was absent so I spent a week throwing away my exhaustion for I felt like I had just delivered a baby. When my nephew visited me, I was informed that he had betrayed me once again. He had, thanks to plastic surgery, regained his actual height, bleached his face and was looking fresh from his mother's womb. He had also spent two years of my sabbatical to recreate his teleporter. How on earth was that a betrayal? Well, he had declared me dead and had inherited everything I owned. He had also destroyed my machine!
I sued him in court. He couldn't murder me because of the AGPS (Advanced GPS). The moment I appeared on earth, the authorities were informed of my arrival. I refused to tell even my lawyer where I was hiding all that time. I made up a story about a device I had created to assist me into hiding from AGPS and I wished the Canadian government to utilize my apparatus to win against the European countries in the Mediterranean Wars. My nephew stated that I was a humbug who had forged an identity. My lawyer called my sister to witness in my favor but she witnessed against me. My wife was dead (so was her brother). I had nobody else to support me. The court ruled that I were to retain 10% of my heirloom on the basis that I had strong arguments in my favor. I had Bakhtiyar Mirza's DNA for God's sake! So I used my 10% to re-establish my life. A few months later, my sister passed away in her sleep. My nephew was still busy re-inventing his teleporter.
It took me seven long years to get over with my poverty and exhaustion. During these years, my nephew completed his teleporter. He managed to hire a volunteer to embark on the first journey via his machine. The plan backfired and the man died horribly. Behram was disrespected once again so he returned to me and declared in court that he had lied against the real Bakhtiyar Mirza. So, in 2070, I, a 58 years old "geezer" (the word we use back then was "hoji/hogee"), created my machine for the second time. My nephew insisted to become the second passenger of that trip. I let him do that, my biggest mistake! Now, by the end of the eleventh century, in the villages of Magand, being known all around the world as the Evil One or the Lucifer or the Anti-Christ, I still think what the fuck happened to Behram for he was the only human being who never returned from that journey. Well, he was the only human being besides me who ever went on that journey.
I waited for him for another seven years until WWIII broke out in the world. China attacked Tibet which attacked India which attacked IRK the annihilation of which resulted in the entire Middle East waging war on Israel (for no apparent reason!). When Israel was bombarded, China and Europe joined forces against the Muslims. When the rains of blood began to smear the Atlantic Ocean, I met the two-man staff I had left with for the last time. I told them to not relocate my machine rather hid my notes at a certain cloud service so, after I return, I could use them to recreate my machine, as I didn't assume I would after before half a century. Thus, I embarked on my third journey to the past as I was now certain that I had invented a sort of time-machine, the very idea I was averse to in the first place! So, on 23rd of November 2077 AD, from Area 51 (US), I began the first diabolical journey of my life. Yes, yes, I mean it was the journey that turned me into the Son of the Morning Star.
I opened my eyes and exclaimed, "This stupid machine has taken me back to the future!" It was because I was standing on a ground. There was blue sky before me and birds were chirping everywhere. I could locate mountains at a distance though there were no human beings nearby. I found myself a shadow. I could barely discern my limbs from the environment. I decided to explore the world I existed as I could move faster than sound.
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